Weirdly, Mr. Spock himself Leonard Nimoy (not Dr. Spock) directed the highest-grossing film of 1987, "Three Men and a Baby." He might be famous for his ears, but he certainly doesn’t have an ear for comedy.
On top of being a one-note joke movie where a trio of rapscallion bachelors don't know how to look after a baby, it also involves a bizarre subplot about heroin dealers chasing after them.
Tom Selleck (of "Magnum, P.I." fame) and his mustache play architect Peter Mitchell, a man in a long-term open-relationship who weirdly lives with his two best buds in a high-rise New York City penthouse apartment, even though he's in his 40s and seems like he has $100 million in the bank.
Steve Guttenberg (of "Police Academy" fame) plays one those roommates, cartoonist Michael Kellam, who pens a famous comic strip about a racist cheetah with sunglasses named Johnny Cool.
Ted Danson (of "Cheers" fame) plays the other roommate, actor Jack Holden, who is the father of the baby left on their doorstep by an awful British woman he used to bang. And it makes sense that he's the father, considering he pulls in slightly more tail than his lothario besties.
Join us as we discuss mock Nancy Travis' awful acting, marvel at how this creepy sex romp and drug caper movie (that happens to have a baby in it) was somehow made by Disney, and as Keating scolds Jim for using the word "cute."
Tell us what you think by chatting with us (@filmsnuff) on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, or by shooting us an email over at mailbag@filmsnuff.com.
This episode is sponsored by Grammy's Sleepytime Formula.
Visit our website at https://www.filmsnuff.com.
According to The New Yorker, the acclaimed director and all-around stand-up guy Woody Allen's 2013 film "Blue Jasmine" is yet another masterpiece in a long line of them. According to us, it is boring masturbatory fantasy from an out of touch ghoul who, in an ideal world, would have been locked up in prison for the past several decades rather than pumping out an endless stream of bombastic nonsense.
Cate Blanchett won Best Actress for playing Jasmine Francis, a mentally damaged widow who we find out through a series of unnecessary flashbacks was married to a wealthy Madoff-inspired Ponzi scheme mastermind. Jasmine really doesn't have a character arc because she is clearly crazy to begin with, but fancy-pants critics would have you believe that the film depicts the subtle unraveling of a fragile soul with a cutting wit that's sharper than an 18th century French guillotine (or something similarly pretentious).
Sally Hawkins was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for playing Ginger, Jasmine's adopted sister who is based on the character Stella Kowalski from Tennessee Williams's play "A Streetcar Named Desire." She is recently divorced from a meathead named Augie, played by Andrew Dice Clay, and is dating a new meathead named Chili, played by Bobby Cannavale, but Jasmine's insistence that she can do better drives her into the arms of a third loser, played by Louis C.K. (speaking of mastabratory fantasies).
Alec Baldwin plays Hal Francis, a rich narcissist who, like Baldwin himself, seemingly sails through life doing and saying whatever he pleases. But the role does require some acting when Johnny Law finally catches up to him and he has to face the music for his lifetime of recklessness.
Tell us what you think by chatting with us (@filmsnuff) on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, or by shooting us an email over at mailbag@filmsnuff.com.
This episode is sponsored by Water Cool It.
Visit our website at https://www.filmsnuff.com.
Francis Ford Coppola's 1992 softcore porn adaptation of Bram Stoker's "Dracula" seems like a bunch of 14-year-old boys got their hands on a camera for the first time, googled how to do cheap practical special effects, and then forced their friends to act in it doing laughable foreign accents.
It’s weird that one of those immature boys made "The Godfather" and the other was Hannibal Lecter. But, it's true. And it's weird that this movie won three Oscars. It's not weird, however, that Winona Ryder and Keanu Reeves were the friends asked to do foreign accents, though. That one made perfect sense and it’s unintentional comedic effect is the best part of this movie by far.
So what was advertised as a very faithful retelling of the famous 1897 book is actually an absurd, campy bastardization. The strong heroine of the novel is instead made to be a starry-eyed ingénue (played lazily by Winona Ryder), and the evil villain, Count Dracula (played by Gary Oldman—who is chewing more scenery here than necks), is made to be some sympathetic, deep-down sweetheart who only wants to make love, not blood.
Um, no.
Then we have one of the greatest film actors of all time, Sir Anthony Hopkins, turning in the worst performance of his career as Van Helsing, who is used primarily as comic relief in this one—and to explain all the dozens of rules the audience has to know (but then the movie disregards completely).
There's a bunch of boobs, buckets of blood, and boatloads of bull honky, but beware, because, boy oh boy, Bram's baby has been blackened not brightened.
Tell us what you think by chatting with us (@filmsnuff) on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, or by shooting us an email over at mailbag@filmsnuff.com.
This episode is sponsored by Husky Burger.
Visit our website at https://www.filmsnuff.com.
In this installment of our periodical "In Theaters" segment, we give you our immediate reaction to seeing a new movie on the big screen. This time, we tackled the newest Jason Reitman-Diablo Cody collaboration, "Tully."
**NOTE: THIS EPISODE CONTAINS SPOILERS**
Quick Facts
Release date: May 4, 2018
Runtime: 1 hour, 35 minutes
Starring: Charlize Theron, Mackenzie Davis, Ron Livingston, Mark Duplass, Gameela Wright, Elaine Tan, Asher Miles Fallica, Lia Frankland
Directed by: Jason Reitman
Tell us what you think by chatting with us (@filmsnuff) on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, or by shooting us an email over at mailbag@filmsnuff.com.
Visit our website at https://www.filmsnuff.com.